They say one thing one day, then they change what they say another day. Depends on what suits their purpose on any given day. They often mean well on either occasion, they just don't realize - you remember what they said the first time. Sometimes they purpose to interfere with your relationship with the other.
I've recently learned to limit what others know about my interactions with people. Being misjudged is a common occurrence. Having someone interfere in the relationships another common occurrence. Seems everyone is good when information is limited.
Many of us would call it privacy. Something you don't get much of as a parent. You can find yourself feeling very exposed. If you have ever had to go to family court for any reason, you have learned to explain yourself and defend yourself, over and over again. Being exposed to a room full of strangers.
People that have never been through trauma, don't understand those that have. While you do your best to 'get over it', You are better off not trying to 'get over it' but rather to 'put it behind you'. Something that is hard to do when others keep bringing it up. "Well I heard...."
You find yourself defending yourself outside of any courtroom, long after the case has closed.
People will hold onto hatred for life, rather than try and understand the other side of a situation and possibly have 'understanding' if not ever 'forgiveness'. People can hate another person that they have never known based on 'what they have been told'. Nothing that ever happened to them personally. Just rumors spread by others. It's so important in life to keep your character with morals, standards, and integrity. Because reputations, are nothing more than other people's opinions.
I had someone tell me recently "you know it's never been an issue between us that has caused a problem, it's always been because of other people, that we haven't been able to have a relationship". Now how sad is that when you think about it. So it's best no one knows we have a relationship between us, and honestly it's been working out quite well. Now I'm sure there are those that assume I am referring to an affair. Again it's sad, as they would be dead wrong.
Cheating has never been my thing. While I have friended many of the opposite sex, I haven't gotten too personal with most. Doesn't matter what the book cover looks like, you would have to read the pages to understand the story. As they say, ' you shouldn't judge a book by it's cover'. You have to keep it real, with respect. For me, it was a situation where I was 'hated' because of how someone else felt love and confidence with sharing intimate thoughts, with me. A jealous wife has made me an enemy on more than one occasion. Through no doings of my own and someone she may have never met.
It's interesting how many people will judge another based on rumors they have been told. How many true relationships, friendships and families have been destroyed by rumors. Most often small facts twisted into large lies. I think the saddest part is when someone has known someone else forever, and yet when they hear a rumor, they jump to the conclusion it's truth. Yet they have known the truth with their own eyes long before they heard the rumor.
Times cause changes. The system, schools and laws by which we live have changed from one generation to the next. Just because something doesn't happen with your generation, doesn't mean it didn't happen in generations before you. Judging someone by things that happened before you were born can be tragic. Laws can differ from one state to the next and one country to another. 'Right and wrong' have been clouded and confused because of many of societies rules.
A favorite saying of mine is "God knows my heart, God knows my intentions, and God knows what they did". One place you can always find comfort and know the rules haven't changed is with the Lord. He knows the truth, and He knows who lies. When you live "with God watching your life" - You can live without conviction and walk in confidence that you are doing what's right, regardless of what people think and say.
People tend to think everyone thinks like they do, that's why when they have done something to someone else, they fear that the other person will be returning to do something just as bad as well. When there are many who think differently. Some of us can move forward, others need revenge. Ever noticed when someone 'hates' you, everyone assumes that you 'hate' them in return.
Ever been accused of 'always bringing it up' after a bad situation. Ever thought maybe you were the one actually bringing it up with the allegations you've heard from rumors? Maybe you're the one holding onto what you have heard, rather than getting to know someone and judge your own experiences rather than someone else's rumors. I'm sure your belief in the rumors has hindered your ability to have a true relationship with the other person.
You miss out on knowing some amazing people, because you believe the rumors and hold it against them; when you don't really know the truth and don't give it a chance to be real.
Blessed by God
Life's real @ the Bright Side of the Barn
Thanks for Stopping by
Until next time, Stay Safe and Happy Trails
