I don't think folks realize the burdens they leave behind for the family. If you have ever been to an estate sale, you might understand what I'm saying.
So many things, that hold no memory or meaning to those left behind. A House full of 'things' that have to be disposed of. Often where there is a time limit.
IF it's a rental you usually have less than 30 days to have everything cleared out. If it's a house or property, you have a little more time, with a lot more work to prepare it for the sale or to turn it over to whoever has inherited it. {The burden and expense of repairs} A process that can involve the courts if a proper will isn't in place. {More burden}
Not to mention making the burial arrangements and the funeral or 'celebration of life', {the new way to bury people.} We don't like to have funerals anymore because we don't like to think of the possibility that our loved ones won't be going to heaven because of the way they lived. Celebration of lives, takes the spiritual connection out of the equation. Helping many grieve more peacefully.
When we pass, people need to grieve. It's a process that can take time, a variable amount of time for each one. We all grieve differently. To have to 'go through' the things and decide what is of sentimental value and what holds no memories, who gets what and what can be sold.. It adds to the pain of grieving. It adds to the list of burdens left behind. Often a sale is necessary to pay for the burial expenses. {Financial burdens left behind as well}
Over the years, I've seen my ex mother in laws possessions have to be cleared out in less than a month, many of which ended up dumped on a dead-end road near a military base. My own parents left a ruthless nephew in charge of the estate, to which he dug a hugh hole in the property and buried many of their possessions. Covering it up so the new property owners would never know it ever existed. My dad's will blatantly ignored. My brothers apartments had to be cleared out in a minimal amount of time, which left a rush to clear it out and a storage bill to give time to sort later.
Not to mention the animals. The pets that are left behind, and usually not wanted by anyone else in the family. A shelter becomes their new home and if they are lucky they find a new family. Their lives torn apart. Some end up being put down, depending on where you live and what the shelter policies are.
What means something to one person may mean nothing at all to another. The fighting begins with who is going to take on the extra burdens, who's going to pay for what. Not to mention who gets what and why. Many Families are torn apart when the matriarch of the family passes. Often leaving siblings to never speak to one another again. Or come together. Some families hold grudges and don't even respect the dead by letting others who are grieving attend the services.
It's sad and horrible what it's come to when we lose a loved one. I feel sorry for those left behind.
Personally I already made sure to give my kids what was important to them and what I wanted them to have. I've reduced my life to minimal 'things' and it should be pretty easy to 'clear' out my living space when I'm gone. We can save those left behind so much grief by paying for our own burial and having a specific plan as to what we want to happen. After all, it is the last request of our own life. It should be our 'choice' our 'way'.
The absolute least we can do for our families is minimalize the burdens we leave behind. If we are not using it - sell it now. Put the money to use or save it for the expenses and to be divided by those left behind. Have our own estate sales and spare the pain it puts on others to have make choices and decisions they shouldn't have to make while they are dealing with the grief of our passing.
Life is a journey, nothing is guaranteed. Tomorrow is not ours to claim, it is a gift if we wake up to enjoy another day. If one is lucky enough to live to a reasonable older age, one should start planning for their final journey toward the next phase of life. Limit the burdens they leave behind in this life. Spare the loved ones the pain and burdens so often left behind.
Seems selfish to me, to hold on to so much that we don't need, just so someone else has to clean up our leftovers.
Blessed by God
Life's a gift @ the Bright side of the Barn
Thanks for Stopping by
Until next time, Stay Safe and Happy Trails.
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